Every parent we have ever met wants to have a smart child and be a smart parent. Raising a child is the most important responsibility anyone will ever have and can provide the most pleasure and reward.
SMART PARENT/SMART CHILD is the revolutionary philosophy that all children are incredibly intelligent from the moment they are born. When parents have learned understanding, respect, highly developed communication and relationship skills and development related expertise, it is amazing what a child can accomplish and, in fact, each child will achieve his maximum potential.
Friday, August 24, 2018
Friday, July 27, 2018
This issue is a hot button for me and has been a subject of discussion on my blog at previous occasions.
It seems lately there is a constant and reinforced use of one of my least favorite words, “owie” or is it “owee”?! It is hard to know how to correct or spell a non word.
Do we think our children cannot distinguish between a cut, a bruise, a scrape, a burn a bite, a rash or an itch?!
There is an inference by both parent and child (this seems to include all adults related or not) to not only blindly group all these possibilities into a situation where the adult mostly overacts, misinforms and generally offers some visible care when in fact, none is warranted or needed.
Crying seems to be expected as well as the latest cartoon character Band-Aid and possibly some reward, (sugar maybe?)
Think of how much wiser and educated children would be if:
1. The condition is correctly labeled.
2. A Band-Aid is only used if the skin has been broken with the possibility the area is bleeding.
3. An anti-itch product is used for insect bites as appropriate before they are scratched and scabbed.
4. The seriousness or lack of, is calmly explained so the child understands what is happening i.e. in most cases a bruise requires no care.
5. Rewards are not connected with minor daytime, playtime injuries.
6. Children will not need to exaggerate their condition since they clearly understand they probably need to be more careful and reduce the possibilities of injury.
It is interesting that when children are injured at daycare, the situation is discussed correctly and, if any follow-up care is required, that is clearly explained.
In almost all cases, they are made aware of how to avoid that injury in the future.
Taking responsibility for what could happen to you and learning to reduce injuries should be the goal.
That is not going to happen when adults overact, do not educate, and turn what should be a learning experience into a pity moment.
As you can tell, advanced verbal skills, education, personal responsibility are high on my list for all children.
Let’s treat them as the intelligent begins they are.
Try it and you will see the interaction completely change for the better!
Tuesday, July 24, 2018
Family Vacation Time? How to ensure it is a maturing opportunity for your child and a rewarding experience for the whole family.
Tuesday, July 17, 2018
We hear horror stories from our friends and want to prevent her from becoming a difficult sleeper. Bringing into our bed is not an option!”
These parents have the right idea. They are seeking a solution to correct these problems before they become permanent and a serious threat to everyone having proper rest and a good night’s sleep.
Lets talk about the nap issue first. There is often a transition in terms of naps anywhere from ten to twelve months. She is right in the middle of this change.
If by 11:00am to 11:30am your child does not seem that tired, you may probably make the move to one longer afternoon nap instead of finding yourself battling with your child to get them to sleep in the morning.
Plan a calmer play schedule at this time, including reading so they are taking a breather. Lunch should then follow by noon and nap at one. They will be very tired by that time, have eaten well, and fall into a deeper sleep for two to two and a half hours or even longer.
Your child will be giving you signals about how much delay they can handle, so there will be some flexibility about exact times. Plan to be home when you are figuring this routine out so you will be able to determine how the plan is proceeding and turn it into a positive result.
If this plan is not working for you i.e. if they are so tired by lunch that they are not getting enough food or are too fussy and cross, then you may want to introduce a different strategy.
For example: Do some quiet reading for five to ten minutes and tell them that it will be naptime when you are done. Then put your child to bed with a clear directive that you will stay with your hand on their back until they are fully asleep. At this age they should be sleeping on their stomach which is more restful and less likely to stimulate play.
We have found this approach to work with everyone. Tell them that when they wake up, they should call for you and not be anxious.
Leave them as soon as they fall asleep.
This approach can work again for the afternoon nap. Make sure they have been up and active for at least three hours and again, begin with reading. They are usually more tired for this nap and will probably fall asleep sooner.
Now we have the challenge of your child waking up in the middle of the night.
Here is a typical scenario:
1. They wake up screaming and probably calling for you one night and you rush in to see what is wrong.
2. After reviewing the obvious
b.Is not puling at their ears
c.Did not do a BM
You realize that possibly nothing serious really happened. You are now somewhat undecided about what to do, but know that everyone has lost some valuable sleep.
3. You may decide you will somehow get them and yourself back to sleep and wait to see what happens next.
4. If it happens again the next night with no cause, you can determine you probably should move to the solution before it becomes a habit.
Tell your child before bedtime the next night that they are fine and need to sleep through the night without waking up. Also, that under no circumstances are you going to go into their room or verbally communicate with them.
The duration of this situation will depend on your child’s personality and whether you have a relationship with them so that they know you mean what you say.
If the answer to the above is positive , the behavior will change quickly, probably in one to two nights.
If you don’t, it will still work but may take longer.
I strongly recommend that you correct this situation quickly, otherwise it will leave everyone exhausted and it will become harder to make it through the day!
Take the best and most positive action for you and your child!
Friday, June 29, 2018
Why Corrective Action Should Always Be Approaches As a Positive Teaching Opportunity, Not a Negative Disciplinary Approach!
Monday, June 25, 2018
How To Prevent Cat Napping, Snacking and Create a Healthier Schedule For Your Infant! We repeatedly experience these behavior patterns with infants and young toddlers who join our daycare.
So what is happening that we rarely see this pattern when these age groups join our daycare?
Let’s talk first about the snacking.
1. A four to five month old is very different than a newborn. Realistically, most one to three month old infants need to be fed whenever they communicate with a hunger cry. Three to five month old infants should be expected to wait awhile between daytime feeds. They can have more interactive communication and playtime so they can begin taking eight oz feeds and reduce the number of times they are fed. For example, they will have 3 eight oz bottles during the day and one 8 oz night feed.
2. At five to six months you will be adding in cereal and creating three distinct meal times.
3. The two snacks in between one in the a.m. and one in the p.m. can be banana/applesauce etc.
4. They will remain on this schedule for the rest of their first year, during which you will be adding in more solids and keeping the milk intake to three daily and one night. Part of their milk intake will be provided in their cereal.
5. They will be satisfied to take five to six hours between meals when they are fully fed.
6. The most common tendencies we see is for the parents to give them a milk feeding or a snack every time they seem distressed instead of occupying them creatively at those times.
7. This fear year is super important if you want to have a healthy, well nourished child with good habits forever.
Now we get to cat napping.
1. Cat nappers are infants or toddlers who have created a pattern of very short naps, morning and afternoon.
2. Very often this occurs because they are away from home during nap time and fall asleep in their car seat or stroller and are awakened when arrive home. If this situation is frequently repeated, it becomes their sleep pattern no matter where they are.
Your child is awaked during his nap approximately thirty to forty minute into their nap. This often happens in the afternoon nap. It is unlikely they have had enough rest. What happens I that you pick them up instead of putting them back to sleep. This timeframe is hardly ever enough sleep. It may take some of your time, a calming touch, to make them fall asleep again. Trust me! It is worth it.
Speaking to any experienced parent, you will find that they agree: when you child is a good eater and a good sleeper, you can probably handle anything that happens during the rest of the day.
Invest your time now, because the payoff is great!