The Joy, Reward, And Surprise When You Really Treat A Child As An Intelligent Human Being!

How is it possible that after all these years of caring for hundreds of children , I am still unexpectedly surprised at their accomplishments.

Right now we have four children under the age of two who are both blowing my mind, measurably altering my expectation and generally totally fascinating me.

Some of my recent experiences:
1. A puzzle that I used to think of as hard is being completed by children eighteen to twenty months old.

2. Everyone is responsible for taking off their shoes and socks and place them in a corner prior to nap. Then they must spell their name which is in upper case letters on the end of their floor cot. They also take their blanket at the end of the nap, place it in the basket and bring their socks and shoes to us for some help in putting them on. This is followed by a trip to the bathroom to get their hairbrush and have us help them be ready for playtime. These tasks now involve a sixteen month old child who joined us three weeks ago.

3. They are all independently responsible for entertaining themselves during open playtime; we have taken the responsibility of teaching them play skills. Our role becomes as a moderator once they have mastered independent and group skills: they choose to play by themselves, with a friend or in a group and are expected to communicate their needs.

4. They have access to all the toys i.e. get puzzles and return them when completed, gather small toys to play with, cook food in the kitchen set, play musical instruments, or with the barn and farm animals. It is rare that we have to interfere, but if that happens they are given the language, if necessary, to resolve problems. They also participate in performances which includes play a xylophone and singing, the whole group joins in the signing with them.

5. They all know their basics, i.e. letters, numbers, colors, shapes, and may sit in on older children’s classes if they are attentive.

6. They are also expected to follow the rule which are based in respecting each other. “You don’t grab a toy because it is not yours”, “You don’t hit because it hurts”.

7. When they break any rules they are told to go to the door and think about what they have done, which is usually 2 to 3 minutes. We then have a conversation with them reminding them of the importance of both caring and respecting their friends.

Not only does our approach create an exciting and rewarding environment for everyone, but it practically eliminates the possibility of what is referred to as the “terrible twos”.

I believe the terrible twos occur because a child was allowed total freedom to do whatever they wanted. There typically were no rules or they were not enforced. Most parents do not believe the child could understand and follow rules at a young age. Then when they turn two and can typically both communicate more effectively, both physically and verbally, they resent or do not understand why they are now being corrected and may be reprimanded for behavior they were always allowed to do.

Understandably, they will resist the corrections and possibly be very angry because of it.
We have never had that experience, most of our children have joined us at a very young age and therefore had a more respectful and educational experience.
As I have written many times before, once you understand that your child is intelligent from the beginning, it will change everything.

 Your joy, surprise, and rewards will be amazing!

Good luck!

Bonding With Your Infant As A Newborn Is Critical To Their Development!

Over the years we have frequently had parents who did not understand the importance of verbally and emotionally connecting with their newborn from the minute they are born.

As many of you know, this is the key message in our parenting book Smart Parent/Smart Child.
The media has also been promoting this fact including the first five campaign in California which has reflected the exact language from our publication.

So it is almost impossible for us to acknowledge that we are still seeing parents who are still disconnected from their infant as an intelligent human being. In these instances, their infant’s needs are solely limited to nutritional and physical care, leaving their emotional and interactive development completely ignored.

By the time they join our daycare, usually following their first birthday, it is alarming to observe the impact on their behavior. They are either angry and aggressive or completely withdrawn from physical interaction.

We have had years of experience and interaction to support these conclusions. These behaviors are primarily displayed toward the mother and other children.

We have seen a long term level of success in helping these parents and children create a strong emotional bond. However, it is no longer as natural and successful until well into their second year and in fact, in several faces, behavioral issues remained throughout their time with us.

For all the parents who have a young child or are expecting their first born, please educate yourself so can provide the best possible experience for you, your partner and your child.

This is the most important thing you can do as a parent.

Good luck!

How we created a successful lunch strategy that supported healthy eating habits

We knew from the beginning that our goals would be a combination of healthy foods in a socially interactive educational environment. We wanted the children to be excited and included in the process.

It took us a few years to arrive at that result and we have maintained the basic formula while periodically making minor changes.

Our Plan

1.Provide food that is tasty, visually appealing, well balanced, and manageable by even a one year old.

2.Provide the same daily menu each week so everyone knows what to expect and is looking forward to it.

3.There are always two vegetables and a mixed bean offering at the beginning of every meal. Those are the only items on each plate when lunch begins.

4.When these are eating, each child requests the protein for the day.

5.Next are the carbs. This is always some form of pasta or rice.

6.Finally, there is an offering of cut fruit.

All of the portions served would be comparable to an adult serving.

What creates such positive energy is that they have to verbally interact throughout the meal by having to request the next item. This is often accompanied by positive comments and some competition which encourages involvement. It is rare that there is a negative comment and when that does happen, it is often responded to by another child. We also make sure we are always listening and consider those comments.

A sample menu is:

1.Edamame beans with broccoli.

2.Black and pinto beans in balsamic dressing.

3.Chicken dog.

4.Penne pasta with garlic salt.

5.Cut pear.

Because they are constantly communicating, it creates an active social environment. This constantly dialogue is motivational, especially when a child is new to the process.

Note: If we want to introduce a new item, it becomes an add on. Its success or not determines if it becomes a regular.

Good luck!

I hope you can enjoy the reward we experience every day!

Is Your Child A Poor Eater?

Is Your Child A Poor Eater?

Here are the most common reasons that we believe are why that happens!

It is rare that we have a child join our daycare after the age of fourteen months who is a good eater.

We have compiled the most common conditions that contribute to that result!

1.They are given too much liquid throughout the day. They may be still on a bottle or using a large sip cup, or both. They may be getting the bottle too often but more commonly, they have huge sup cups filled with water/juice/milk on an ongoing basis throughout the day. This is also more than likely happening very close to mealtime as well.

I call this “liquid bloat” these children are getting way too much liquid! How can they possibly be hungry enough to desire and enjoy solid food?

There seems to be a belief that they need a constant ingestion of liquid, or it is because it keeps the child quiet. Their bodies need time to build up a desire for food!

2. They are given a snack too close to mealtime, often as soon as they said they were hungry. Distract them instead with a new activity. Show them on the clock when they will be eating and they will have to wait until then. Sometimes physical activity can be more successful than quieter time.

3. They were given the same food repeatedly because they liked it. You fell into a habit of not expanding their menu. For example, having peanut butter and jelly sandwiches or hot dogs all the time is not a healthy habit. You need to expect more from them.

4.There are no family meals. A child is expected to eat a meal by themselves while the parents are otherwise occupied.

5.The child is offered different food than the parents are eating. The parents themselves have a different menu which gives the child a confusing message.

6.They eat by themselves at a different time to the parents can enjoy their meal together.

Food is a social experience. Your child will learn to enjoy food more readily when there is a pleasant environment and food that is being shared by all.

We will discuss this issue again and share our approach to mealtime at our daycare as well as the approach we have used forever with great results.

Talk to you again next week!

Good luck!