The Dumbing Down Of the English Language to Accommodate Our Children!

Or is it because adults think it is appealing or cute to hold onto words that sound infantile as a connection to their child.

This issue is a hot button for me and has been a subject of discussion on my blog at previous occasions.

It seems lately there is a constant and reinforced use of one of my least favorite words, “owie” or is it “owee”?! It is hard to know how to correct or spell a non word.

Do we think our children cannot distinguish between a cut, a bruise, a scrape, a burn a bite, a rash or an itch?!

There is an inference by both parent and child (this seems to include all adults related or not) to not only blindly group all these possibilities into a situation where the adult mostly overacts, misinforms and generally offers some visible care when in fact, none is warranted or needed.
Crying seems to be expected as well as the latest cartoon character Band-Aid and possibly some reward, (sugar maybe?)

Think of how much wiser and educated children would be if:

1. The condition is correctly labeled.

2. A Band-Aid is only used if the skin has been broken with the possibility the area is bleeding.

3. An anti-itch product is used for insect bites as appropriate before they are scratched and scabbed.

4. The seriousness or lack of, is calmly explained so the child understands what is happening i.e. in most cases a bruise requires no care.

5. Rewards are not connected with minor daytime, playtime injuries.

6. Children will not need to exaggerate their condition since they clearly understand they probably need to be more careful and reduce the possibilities of injury.

It is interesting that when children are injured at daycare, the situation is discussed correctly and, if any follow-up care is required, that is clearly explained.

In almost all cases, they are made aware of how to avoid that injury in the future.

Taking responsibility for what could happen to you and learning to reduce injuries should be the goal.
That is not going to happen when adults overact, do not educate, and turn what should be a learning experience into a pity moment.

As you can tell, advanced verbal skills, education, personal responsibility are high on my list for all children.

Let’s treat them as the intelligent begins they are.

Try it and you will see the interaction completely change for the better!

Good luck!

Family Vacation Time? How to ensure it is a maturing opportunity for your child and a rewarding experience for the whole family.

August is the favorite month for family travel and can be a daunting experience for parents. They are trying to figure out how to have everyone enjoy the experience and return feeling successful and rewarded.

Firstly you need to plan ahead, especially in terms of how this experience will impact your child and the family experience.

For Infants

Suggestions

If your child is under the age of one, your challenge is to try and keep them on their feeding and sleep schedule as much as possible. This is particularly true if you are travelling to different time zones. Many parents have achieved their greatest success by keeping infants on their home time schedule regardless of where they are. This will probably create some inconvenience for you, but the feedback seems to indicate the positive results outweigh any inconveniences.

Make sure they have enough toys and books etc. so they are occupied during their awake time.

Do not get in the habit of carrying them around all the time or expecting them to be quiet all the time.

Make sure they have stimulating activity and adequate floor time.

Hopefully you are vacationing in a child friendly environment that can be comfortable for everyone.

If your child is older, you want them to take some responsibility and be more included in the process.

Suggestions

Make sure they have their own backpack. This should contain a few of their favorite books, some new books, small activities that they may be able to handle on their own in an airplane or car and a small sketch or doodle item.

They should be responsible for their backpack and its contents and carry it themselves at all times.

Inform them each day what the planned activities are. This should include names of all locations, what they can expect, as much information about the purpose of each activity, and what you expect from them. A review of their knowledge at the end of each day is always a good wrap up.

Outline their responsibilities for each day and what you expect. This may become a discussion. If so, listen and accommodate them when possible. If that is not an option, tell them why and be firm.

Under no circumstances should they be sharing your bed. Arrange for air beds, cots etc. We have often seen any maturing process lost when they are not respected as individuals where sleep space is concerned.

Do Not OVERBOOK! Exhaustion can ruin the best plans and also create misbehavior.

Try to remain on a schedule that is as close to normal as possible.

If they are returning to an organized environment upon their return, then allow them enough transition time to readjust.

Remember to acknowledge their positive behavior and great listening skills at the end of each day.

We have consistently witnessed more mature behavior when a child returns to our daycare after a well planned vacation.

Good luck!

Sleep Challenges!

“We are seriously having some serious sleep issues with my one you old. She is extremely difficult to get to sleep at naptime, and now she is waking up in the middle of the night, which she has not done in months. No matter what we do, it is either a screaming scene until she is hoarse and then we feel badly and pick her up, or else we lie down with her.

We hear horror stories from our friends and want to prevent her from becoming a difficult sleeper. Bringing into our bed is not an option!”

These parents have the right idea. They are seeking a solution to correct these problems before they become permanent and a serious threat to everyone having proper rest and a good night’s sleep.
Lets talk about the nap issue first. There is often a transition in terms of naps anywhere from ten to twelve months. She is right in the middle of this change.

If by 11:00am to 11:30am your child does not seem that tired, you may probably make the move to one longer afternoon nap instead of finding yourself battling with your child to get them to sleep in the morning.

Plan a calmer play schedule at this time, including reading so they are taking a breather. Lunch should then follow by noon and nap at one. They will be very tired by that time, have eaten well, and fall into a deeper sleep for two to two and a half hours or even longer.

Your child will be giving you signals about how much delay they can handle, so there will be some flexibility about exact times. Plan to be home when you are figuring this routine out so you will be able to determine how the plan is proceeding and turn it into a positive result.

If this plan is not working for you i.e. if they are so tired by lunch that they are not getting enough food or are too fussy and cross, then you may want to introduce a different strategy.

For example: Do some quiet reading for five to ten minutes and tell them that it will be naptime when you are done. Then put your child to bed with a clear directive that you will stay with your hand on their back until they are fully asleep. At this age they should be sleeping on their stomach which is more restful and less likely to stimulate play.

We have found this approach to work with everyone. Tell them that when they wake up, they should call for you and not be anxious.

Leave them as soon as they fall asleep.

This approach can work again for the afternoon nap. Make sure they have been up and active for at least three hours and again, begin with reading. They are usually more tired for this nap and will probably fall asleep sooner.

Now we have the challenge of your child waking up in the middle of the night.
Here is a typical scenario:

1. They wake up screaming and probably calling for you one night and you rush in to see what is wrong.

2. After reviewing the obvious
        a.No fever
        b.Is not puling at their ears
        c.Did not do a BM

You realize that possibly nothing serious really happened. You are now somewhat undecided about what to do, but know that everyone has lost some valuable sleep.

3. You may decide you will somehow get them and yourself back to sleep and wait to see what happens next.

4. If it happens again the next night with no cause, you can determine you probably should move to the solution before it becomes a habit.

Tell your child before bedtime the next night that they are fine and need to sleep through the night without waking up. Also, that under no circumstances are you going to go into their room or verbally communicate with them.

The duration of this situation will depend on your child’s personality and whether you have a relationship with them so that they know you mean what you say.

If the answer to the above is positive , the behavior will change quickly, probably in one to two nights.

If you don’t, it will still work but may take longer.

I strongly recommend that you correct this situation quickly, otherwise it will leave everyone exhausted and it will become harder to make it through the day!

Take the best and most positive action for you and your child!

Good luck!