Introduction:

Every parent we have ever met wants to have a smart child and be a smart parent. Raising a child is the most important responsibility anyone will ever have and can provide the most pleasure and reward.

SMART PARENT/SMART CHILD is the revolutionary philosophy that all children are incredibly intelligent from the moment they are born. When parents have learned understanding, respect, highly developed communication and relationship skills and development related expertise, it is amazing what a child can accomplish and, in fact, each child will achieve his maximum potential.


Our mission is to help you achieve that goal. The key to a child's education and success is a skilled, knowledgeable, informed and educated parent.

This blog addresses specific issues, to really be the best parent possible the book is a must!

Thursday, May 28, 2015

A lovely note from a former student!

This week is a bit different for the blog post, mostly because of the holiday weekend.  I hope everyone reading had a wonderful Memorial Day and was able to spend it (like I did) with family that you love while paying respect to those that we honor on that day.

I thought I would share with you a wonderful post card that I received from a student of mine that was in the daycare for four years.  She truly is proof that the teachings in Smart Parent Smart Child  work and help to ensure your child's success in life.  I have re-typed the card below in case you can't read it.

"Dear Phyllis,

I just wanted to say hi from college!  I'm at UC Berkeley now and I wanted to thank you for helping me gain a great foundation for the rest of my life.  I also know it as your birthday recently so, happy birthday! I hope that you are doing well and that I can see you soon.

Love Zoe"

Such a smart and considerate child!  Nothing makes me happier than to see that the effects of good child raising still bear fruit over a decade and half later.

For all the easy to follow guidelines on how to ensure your child will have a better chance of getting into a top tier school you should purchase Smart Parent Smart Child here!



Tuesday, May 19, 2015

How to Have a Child Who Listens to You All of the Time!

Robert is a six month old and has mastered the crawling skill, including an impressive level of speed.

He was already used to being spoken to all the time-talking to him about everything that was happening in his world-feeding time, playtime, social interaction time, bedtime and everything in between.  We decided it is time to take him to the next level.

While he is on the floor playing and crawling I position myself four to five feet away and call to him to come and change his diaper.  Obviously, he does not comprehend what he should do.  I repeat it three times with 10 to 15 second intervals and then approach him and physically turn him in the direction of the changing pad and off he goes.  I congratulate him on his arrival.  I repeat this each changing time for the next three days and guess what? At the end of the third day he is crawling to me with no assistance.

The next step is to broaden his understanding and skill.  My first choice is to add in his bottle at feeding time.  He is quicker to catch on to this request, partly because of his earlier experience, and also his natural interest in food.

I simply progress from there to more areas that are practical and accessible for him i.e. a favorite toy, his bed, lunch time etc. I also include my assistant in the process.

Now at nineteen months he is an understanding listener.  He does periodically challenge us, which for us, is a positive as we do encourage assertiveness and independence.

This process was not hard; it required a firm plan, clear directives, respect for him and consistency.

If your child is older, have everyone who is participating in their care on board.  It is especially important that both parents take this approach.  It reduces the probability that the child will challenge or resist becoming an active listener.

Important!

1. Before you begin, explain to your child what is going to happen and what your expectations are.
2. If you haven’t already established clear well defined boundaries, expectations, rules and consequences, do so before beginning the process.
3. Do not say anything you don’t mean.
4.  Follow up on everything you say.
5. Remember to wait 15 seconds between the first to requests, this shows respect for their intelligence and allows time for them to make the choice to listen.

We have applied this strategy to all ages with positive results every time!


My final observation is that if your child does not listen to you, it makes every aspect of parenting not work!

For more easy to follow guidelines on how to ensure your child listens to you at bedtime you should purchase Smart Parent Smart Child here!

Thursday, May 14, 2015

The Joy of Knowledge

I had planned to write on a different topic this week but I am so blown away by circumstances that are currently occurring at the daycare that I am compelled and excited to share them with you!

We have always had high expectations for all our children in all developmental areas and place some emphasis on general knowledge in our daycare.  Last year, besides our academic program, our special project for the four and five year olds was “The World”.

We have large color maps of the United States of America and the world throughout the daycare.  It just so happened that we selected geography as that year’s project. Not only did the children learn the names of all the states, but also the continents and the oceans of the world. The individual memory skills in the children varied from 70% to 100% knowledge.

Then we decided to create a globe so they would visually understand the shape of the world.

We started with a large yoga ball and after several failed attempts to shrink a world map and glue it to the ball (arts and crafts are not my area of expertise!) I realized I had the solution in house.  I had my grandson, who is an artist; draw the outline of all the countries on the ball and then the children painted them. The experience for them was so amazing in terms of their personal accomplishment and their emotional and cognitive connection to the world. 

The finished globe is now hanging in the daycare.  The children share it with everyone who visits us with great detail for their parents.

However, my real story is that this year we decided to study the human body for the same group.  We are working with several media sources; large posters covering the main areas of the body, skeletal, digestive, respiratory and circulatory systems and then a full human body skeleton.  These are posted over the chalk boards on project days.

Here is the ongoing surprise!  It is the two and three year olds who ask if this day is a project day and want to be involved! When I realized they were serious and persistent, I decided to include them for as long a time as their attention span allowed.

I have always believed that children are capable of amazing things, but now I have a two year old talking to her dad about the digestive system and an eighteen month old excited to show his mom the skeleton.

My excitement is not about bragging about their abilities, but instead realizing that they are building longer attention spans, memory skills, interactive skills, levels of curiosity and best of all: have a joy and pride of knowledge which will be with them for a lifetime!

Make learning, visual, fun, challenging, non-competitive and above all interesting! Enjoy!


For more easy to follow guidelines on how to ensure you child enjoys learning you should purchase Smart Partent Smart Child here!

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Children sleeping through the night (Or who should be!)

Paul is a high energy two and half year old who is rarely picked up from daycare before 6:30pm.  He has been stalling when leaving daycare; he wants to play in the yard, does not respond to his mother’s request to go and often leaves crying.

When they arrive home, dinner has already been prepared and they sit down to eat immediately.  Paul has had no time to relax, play with his toys, talk to his mom and dad, help prepare the meal or set the table.  He also could still be upset about the circumstances of his departure from daycare.
Most of the conversation during the meal centers on his lack of interest in his food, the time it is taking him to eat and the fact that it is now almost time for his bath and bed.

Since the parents have no set routine pre-bedtime, they are usual caught up in coaxing, bribing, contradicting each other, giving in to Paul’s request for more reading, drinks of water, favorite toys in the bed, or whatever delay he can think of.  When he finally does get to sleep there is a strong probability that he will wake during the night and want to sleep in their bed!

Here is the reality!

Most parents consider the moment when their child goes to bed to sleep through the night as the most rewarding part of their day.  However, their child does not have the same emotion or goal!
So, if you want a predictable, smooth, happy experience at bedtime you need to answer some questions first.

-Does your child listen to you all day?
-Do you mean what you say and follow through on it?
-Did you spend quality time with your child during the day?
-Was dinner a pleasant family experience and did they have a nutritious meal minus a “sugar treat”?
-Do you have a bedtime routine that you follow no matter what?
If you answered “no” to any or many of these questions you are setting yourself up for a challenging situation every night.

Trust me, a rewarding, positive bedtime experience is possible every day!  Remember, bedtime is at the end of the day!

-Make sure your child always knows what the plan is for the day and exactly what you expect from them.
-Expect them to listen all the time and follow through when they don’t.
-Whether you are a stay at home parent or have you child in daycare, plan specific quality time with them.
-Make sure your child is getting your attention when needed.
-Expect your child to do their own tasks.  Also, give them household responsibilities such as; feed the dog, set the table, and put their clothes in the hamper.  Add on any that are age appropriate and thank them when they are completed.

Your child will feel respected, important and proud.

Now for the evening routine!
-Make dinnertime conversation that includes your child, keep it interesting and positive.
-Allow some quiet playtime prior to the bedtime routine-no over stimulation.  This is not time for roughhousing, or any activity that you might consider in order to exhaust them, it won’t!
-If you picked you child up at 6:30 like Paul was, and he had a 2 hour nap, bedtime should be 8:30 to 9:00pm.
-Adjust the times according to your personal schedule.

Bedtime Routine
-Parents should probably alternate spending this time with the child.  Make sure that you both follow the same routine and have the same expectations.
-Bedtime should include giving as much responsibility to your child as possible.
-Let them select two books to read.  They can be repeats or different each night, but never scary or violent.
-They should not have toys or stuffed animals in their bed, this is strictly a sleep space.
-Tell them that you expect them to stay in bed.  You have had a great evening together and you see them at (state the exact time you feel is appropriate).
-Provide a clock or some time agent that they understand.
-If they have been getting out of their bed during the night make it clear that this is NOT acceptable and they will be taken back to their own room. Do not relent!

Depending on how long the problem has been going on you may have to sit at their bedroom door until they get the message.

I assure you that if you follow these recommendations the chances of you being successful are very high!  When your child is respected, listened to, has clear expectations and boundaries all day- bedtime will simply be an extension of that and will become a very pleasant and rewarding experience.


For more easy to follow guidelines on how to get your child to listen to you so that they will sleep through the night you should purchase Smart Partent Smart Child here!