The Challenge and Necessity Of Helping Children Deal With Their Emotions and Behavior!

A look at typical behavior in our daycare:

1.Anna will grab toys from other children, run away and then cry when she is expected to give them back.

2.Bryan has learned to cry for everything because it works at home.

3.Peter is getting more upset when his mom does not pick him up on time and is often withdrawn by the time she arrives.

4.Robert had started biting his friends when his feeling got out of control.

5.Mark had begun hitting when he wanted to be included in an activity.

We approach these situations from two perspectives.

We are totally committed to respecting a child’s feelings. They cannot move effectively from anger to sorry in one step without an acknowledgement of their initial feelings.

A straight forward question, “how do you feel right now?” following aggressive heavier will allow the child to respond honestly to the conditions that probably initiated the actions.

This approach usually diffuses the level of anger when it is followed by an acknowledgement of these feelings and then can move on to an appropriate solution.

We are also totally committed to strictly focusing on the action and not the child.

Children are never bad or good.

What they are is a child who follows or breaks the rules, is respectful or disrespectful, listens or does not, tells the truth or tells lies ect.

Do not label their person.

Some key exchanges that focus on the action only to resolve our initial examples:

1.Identify the action and then have them take it.  “Anna, do you know that this toy is not yours? May is going to ask you to please return it”.

2.Bryan, crying does not work at daycare to get your way, you will have to use your words.

3.Peter would like to tell you how he feels right now, “Mommy, I get sad when you are late”.

4.Robert, when you feel like biting, tell me and we will count to ten together.

5. Mark is told by a child in the playground “Do not hit me, it hurts!”

We are convinced that every single child has the skill and understanding to either completely handle their own solutions when given the language and to show respect for their peers when they feel the rules and expectations are clearly defined.

Empower them!

Confidence, skill, and knowledge will be the best assets in helping a child handle their emotions and behavior!

Good luck!