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SMART PARENT/SMART CHILD is the revolutionary philosophy that all children are incredibly intelligent from the moment they are born. When parents have learned understanding, respect, highly developed communication and relationship skills and development related expertise, it is amazing what a child can accomplish and, in fact, each child will achieve his maximum potential.

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Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Advice For New Parents Of Twins

A Cynthia Anka Post

It's Twins!

Those words tend to take a bit longer to get a handle on than hearing "Congratulations! You are pregnant". The expectation to becoming parents is amplified once the reality has set in that there will be 2.  
One parent wrote, " We expected that the first six months would be very difficult, but I don't think we fully understood how difficult until we were in the thick of it. Our strategy was to quickly tend to whichever baby started to cry first with the hope that the other would not be woken. That did not work very well and we would spend anywhere between 30-90 minutes at a time putting them back down. This would happen multiple times during the night, resulting in a maximum of 4-5 hours of broken sleep for months on end. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture for a very good reason..."

These parents were feeling so helpless and exhausted and did not know how to make the situation better. 

"The difference with our kids after our first night working together (with me) was incredible. Simple techniques, such as changing the size of the diaper to allow for better digestion and elimination, and letting them cry it our for a period of time had a dramatic effect. That, combined with a better understanding of "why" they were crying, how to deal with it without feeling like horrible parents, more knowledge of the feeding pattern and lots more useful information put us back on the path to sanity. In just one month, as our twins turned eight months, it was pretty much smooth sailing from there."

Yes, twins are double the care and worry and time but the key to minimizing being overwhelmed it to think of them as two people, not one. They just happened to be born at the same time. They are individuals with their own personalities and body rhythms. Yes, they have similar needs and developmental stages but they will not always be in sync. Listen to them as each one communicates with you. 
Usually, if you let the flow happen naturally, they will stagger and you will be able to spend quality time with each one and both will be soundly sleeping within a reasonable time frame and then rest time for you until the next feeding time. 

Of course, having help would be a huge benefit, especially the first 3-4 months until sleeping through the night. If that is not available to you, do your best to be organized. Find your rhythm

Yes, there will be days when it is all a blur but there will be many more filled with joy and delight and you could not imagine your life being any other way. 

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